Remind Me Not To Visit Rpg.net Anymore.

Recently bored with EnWorld, Dragonsfoot, and the Labyrinth Lord forums all at once, I decided to visit the rpg.net forums that I signed up for once and then never posted on.

And I regret it.

It's like everybody who thinks that more rules is "more better" and wants games to tell them exactly how to play and buys "adventure paths" and worships at the feet of Pathfinder and 4e all congregated at the same place to provide each other with shallow, boring conversation about some crappy, crappy crap.

Nearly 3/4 of the posts on the main page are questions regarding the rules on some popular game (Exalted seems to be number one at the moment, for some unholy reason) with such interesting topics as:

"Exalted+: Long term effect of Alchemical interaction with celestial exalts"


"[Exalted] Return of the Scarlet Empress is out! "


"[Exalted] Primordial Intimacies"


Oh, wow, isn't that interesting? Maybe I'm the wrong kind of audience (I am), or maybe I'm just upset that there isn't a forum to system-neutral gaming or the kind of questions that aren't the blase, uninteresting "How does system X work in game Y, I am mentally unable to make something up," or "Tell me how to play game Y, I cannot read due to my eyes having atrophied." 


Actually, that second one would be awesome. But the point is, the game design thread is filled with boring cruft and people writing fantasy heartbreakers like it's something new, the D&D subsection is devoted to 4e and Pathfinder, There's almost nothing worth reading, unless you're either 


a) Extremely interested in the boring, bloated systems that modern game designers are producing, or


b) Extremely interested in, I dunno, some other crap.


Long story short: Rpg.Net is a cesspool and I'm only going there out of an interest to spread the Good Word about old-school games.

Open Call: Atlanta FLGS

I'm (relatively) new to the Altanta, Georgia area. Does anybody know of any good FLGSes in the area, or of any groups that need a player or two or, hell, a group of people looking for a new DM? I've been hankering to get outside of my usual "comfort zone", if you will, and game with some new people. As much as I love gaming with the people that I've been gaming with for however long it's been, I'm sure you guys know the feeling.

Despite the tone on my blog, I'm game-neutral and would be just as happy to play Pathfinder or some White Wolf silliness as good 'ol basic D&D.

Sneak Peek: Crayonian Classes

Today I'm going to write a little bit about a side project I've been working on whose working name is Crayonian Classes, based, of course, off of one of my pseudonyms. It's a basic rewriting of the classes in Labyrinth Lord, because variety isn't the enemy.

It uses a number of my houserules, which are all terribly minor things that shouldn't be a problem to anybody. First, is my Weapon Sizes and Damage modification, which assigns each weapon a damage die based on its size and whether or not it is blunt. In addition, it organized armor into three categories, which I'm not sure has been written just in this blog just yet.

To be clear:

Unarmored, Leather, Padded, and Studded Leather are "Light" armor.
Scale Mail and Chain Mail are "Medium" armor.
Banded Mail and Plate Mail are "Heavy" armor.
Shields are in their own category and are indicated individually.

Also, it features classes that go only to level 9, at which point they can build a stronghold and become  local rulers of some parcel of land or, if they choose, they can continue to wander about. There are a couple of reasons for that. Firstly, character classes gain only a tiny bit of hit points relative to the experience needed to gain a level. In essence, levels above 9 are a soft cap, providing the illusion of continued advancement while providing nearly nothing to characters who aren't magic users. Oh wow, an additional three hit points for getting 1.5 million experience? That sure was worth it.

Secondly, instead of a character limit of 36, why not just limit it at 9? At this point in the game, characters have changed role entirely, having gone from scrappy underdogs to local legends, folk heroes, and whispered names. They have entire castles, and are dealing with peasant's local land rights and diplomatic relations. By necessity of their increased power, they simply can't run around and continue slaying monsters, stealing their stuff, and finding ever more magical swords. It doesn't work that way any more than Superman can, for example, stop saving the world and fighting aliens and stuff.

Thirdly, it caps level inflation hard. Ninth level, that's it. At ninth level, you're nine times as tough as a normal man, and nine times as good at fighting. You're capable of incredible feats of magic, and you're a legend in your own lands. For the same reasons that you can argue that Holmes D&D is a complete set, or that level advancement should be limited to level six, I argue that level 9 is fine. You know what else has nine levels? Elephants, Chimeras, Bulettes, Dragons, Hydras, Vampires, Remorhaxes, Stone Giants. If you think that being as tough as a damn Stone Giant isn't quite enough power, then there's something wrong with you.

Before I get even more off track, here's a sneak peek of the Witchfinder, a new base class that I've been designing. I hope you like it as much as I do.

Death by Mold / What's Next?

One of my players the other week died because they set foot in some yellow mold. The mold, being a weaker variety than normal, dealt less damage than it normally would have. After being burnt a little by its acid, they took note and decided to drop a torch on it.

Normally, it would have resulted in a normal bit of damage, but this mold happened to be underground in an extremely arid environment. The fire spread out, and burnt both the players for a tiny bit of damage, which unfortunately was more than the Minotaur ("reskinned" fighter) could bear. He died, leaving the cleric to flee back to the surface where the Minotaur's brother was waiting for the two of them to come out. When only the cleric returned, Minotaur II vowed to finish his brother's works.

Just a quick anecdote on one of my favorite player deaths. Set ablaze by a yellow mold's corpse! Classic.

Servants of Plague Released TODAY!

Even though it's my birthday, I'm giving you guys a present: The long-delayed Servants of Plague pdf, available now from Scribd. It's designed for a small low-level party, and it's a fairly minimalistic set of notes, clocking in at under 20 pages. That's despite there being stats for three new monsters, a couple of new magic items, five or six diseases, 20+ areas, and two maps. If you're looking for a quick bang-for-your-buck deal, then Servants of Plague has got your number. For the low, low price of free, you can have a 20-page quick-playing adventure for you and your buddies.

Even though it's up on Scribd, I'm still not sold on the cover layout or the two-column style of the text on the inside of the pdf. Let me know what you guys think- good, bad, or in between.


I hope you like it as much as I liked writing it!

The link: http://www.scribd.com/doc/35352402/Servants-of-Plague

The forum link is here.

The German-language version is here: http://www.scribd.com/doc/35878497/DieDienerschaftderSeuche

A Map for Servants of Plague

Just a quick question: Are maps an area of serious concern? Would a seriously amateur map (drawn by me, more than likely) be especially noticeable? Is a bad map worse than no map whatsoever?

Just wondering. The closer my module gets to completion, the more questions pop up before it's ready to be seen by the public.

Mayhem Festival

As a result of going to go see the Mayhem Festival yesterday, I am tired, scraggly, half-deaf, and more than a little sunburnt. However, I got to:

• See Shadows Fall. They put on an awesome show. And a giant crowd chanting "Shadows Motherfucking Goddamn Fall" is pretty entertaining too.
• Ignore Norma Jean, Winds of Plague, and Atreyu. They're all a bunch of post-hardcore, screamo horseshit. Norma Jean at least is from Atlanta, and they sounded alright, but I'm not standing in Georgia's hot-ass high-noon sun to see a band that I don't even halfway enjoy.
• See Hatebreed. I'd never really listened to them before, but they put on a monster live show. Plus, Jamie Jasta has an awesome beard. Seriously, that thing is cool.
• Stood right up next to the stage for Three Inches of Blood. Those dudes are awesome, and when I get the pictures up, I'm putting them here. 3IOB was insanely good. Seriously, if you're reading this, you at least like the subject matter, with songs like The Goatrider's Horde and Trial of Champions and Forest King. They're like a heavier Iron Maiden, if you will.
• Saw Lamb of God live again, and got in a sweet circle pit. I can't help it, I love circle pits. People start going around and around and then I start going around and around and then horrible things happen. It's a disease, I swear!
• Then I stood in line for half an hour and got to meet Jamey Jasta and *GASP* Randy Blythe, who are both really cool. They liked my girlfriend, and when they found out I was in the service, they both shook my hand and told me they were glad I made it home safe. My girlfriend was walking on clouds the rest of the night. My brother got my Kuwait hat signed. (Which is his hat? He stole it/I gave it to him when I got back, so whatever) Point is, I met a couple of metal superstars. Dudes headline stages and stuff. It's awesome. I'd only ever seen Jamie on Headbanger's Ball where I made fun of his totally indifferent attitude, but seeing him in person he was animated and seemed to be enjoying himself. Randy looked tired as hell, but he did just get off from playing on the main stage, so he was probably sore and tired and about half deaf. Holy fuck, it was cool. I can't stop thinking about how cool those dudes were.
• Saw Rob "Motherfucking" Zombie live. That was pretty cool. He puts on a good live show. The part where his guitarist soloed for like ten straight minutes was lame as hell, but the rest was good fun. They had ten foot high fireballs and a giant robot spewing exhaust and screens with rediculous shit on it and all sorts of cool stuff.
• Also saw Korn for the first three songs. None of us like Korn that much, and we all like sleep, so we took off. They were pretty good live, though, so at least there was that.

I apologize for the profanity, but I went to see some of the top bands in metal last night for my birthday, so there was that.